I've recently had to do some car seat switching. Jack borders between a five point harness and booster. He's technically ready for a booster, in theory. So I bought him a new one. After about two booster days, I decided he was going back in a five point. He wouldn't stay put and kept unbuckling himself at all the wrong times. In his five point, he can get the shoulder straps undone by himself, but that bottom buckle sticks and I have to unbuckle it for him.
Fast forward..
It's a long story but circumstances led to the following situation: Jack, Gemma and Toby were locked in the van along with my keys, my purse, and my cell phone. The van was running and the air conditioner was on. They were all buckled securely in their seats. We were parked in the dentist's office parking lot. No one with an extra key was anywhere near being able to come save us. We were stranded and I needed to figure out how I was going to get in.
I took my post by the back window, the one that looks in to where Jack was sitting. He could hear me so I explained that I couldn't get in and I needed his help. I told him that I wanted him to unbuckle himself. He looked at me like I had spaghetti coming out of my nose. I told him again to try to unbuckle his seat belt. He smirked and started working on it. It was clear that he truly couldn't get that buckle unsnapped. His shoulder straps were already off but that bottom latch is a bugger and he just couldn't get it. I kept telling him to push harder, to use both thumbs. To take a break and try again and to give it all he's got. No luck.
I moved on to plan "b". I told him to try to wiggle himself up and out of the shoulder straps while still buckled. He shimmied and squirmed but nothing short of some crazy contortionist moves were going to get him out of those tight straps. I took consolation that at least he was correctly fastened in his seat. Even if it meant I couldn't get my dang car unlocked.
I them moved to plan "c". I told him to just unbuckle his whole seat from the car. Luckily his seat wasn't installed with the new latches and tethers. His seat was buckled in to the van the old fashioned way using a lap belt in the very back seat. He reached around and pushed that button, releasing his car seat from the seat. He was still strapped in to the car seat it self though.
This is the part where I started laughing. No doubt the people who were out and about that day were wondering about the crazy lady who was dancing around and gesturing outside of her van window. And now she was laughing. I laughed because there was hope. I knew we would eventually work this out without the help of a locksmith and his extravagant fee. Jack would get this taken care of, somehow. This was his opportunity to use his ninja/Navy Seal/Mac Gyver moves for good and not evil. Now you have to know the layout of our van. It's not your typical 12 passenger with bench seats. This is an old hotel airport shuttle. It has stairs. It has an aisle. The back row spans the width of the van. Jack's seat is straight back down the aisle. So he stood up like a little turtle with his shell of a car seat still attached to his back and he tried to walk up the aisle. One step, then a jerk. The seat was too wide to go down the aisle. Dang.
I started coaching him on trying to turn to the side. No luck. We tried turning to the other side. Nope. Crouching down. No. Standing on his tippy toes. No. Hmmm. My charades outside of the van were getting progressively more odd. Then I had a great idea. What if he climbed over the back seat and unlocked the back door?! Wow, I'm a genius! I started talking him through it but stopped mid-way because I realized that there is a bar that spans the storage area for hanging things from. I suddenly pictured Jack, in his car seat, suspended helplessly from that bar, hanging from his seat. That would be the end of the rescue and we would be calling in for back up.
That is when it dawned on me. I needed him to climb over all of the seats and then unlock the side door. He got it and started in on the climb. It was absolutely hilarious. My little snail, housing his seat on his back slowly climbed over all of the seats until he reached the lock and with a grin, yanked it up. I laughed and cried all at the same time. "Jack, you are the hero! You saved the day!" And he did.
But he still hasn't graduated to a booster. Maybe next year.
40 comments:
Excuse me, I just need to get some tissues this post is soooooooo funny!
You're okay if I link this one to the outside world, huh?
That is a wonderfully written account of an absolutely hysterical situation...the stuff a good book is made of! I want to link to it as well.
Link permission granted.
Like you need permission. Go right ahead, I'm flattered.
Oh, that was priceless! Once again, your children are making the day a little bit brighter. Thanks!
That is the best ever! I can totally see Jack climbing over those seats!
Still cracks me up! I think he needs a new pair of superman pajamas with a cape for his super-hero feat!
I laugh out loud everytime I picture him climbing with the seat on his back!
I laughed SO HARD...I have tears.
I am not kidding that is a bleeping RIOT of a post. I am stumbling it. So DANG funny.
I just read this via Trash's blog...and had to say how hilarious it was. Jack is a true hero, I think he deserves some really special treatment for a while!!!
AAaaaaaaaaaaaah, those were the best visual images ever. Jack is a hero, that's for sure!
oh my goodness, that is the best ever! way to go Jack- you saved the day, what a guy!
Oh.my.word. That is sooo darn funny! My son came in the computer room asking what I was laughing about! :-)
Good boy, Jack!
you wouldn't believe how badly i needed to read such a hilarious story today. thanks, heth...and jack :)
Hilarious!
You and Jack make quite the team.
Heth, I couldn't get the link specifically for this post so.... I have lifted the whole thing and posted it. Obviously all credit and kudos has been applied. To date Jack has one proposal of marriage - Thanks Katy.
This is HYSterical!!! I died laughing. Thanks...just what I needed after a stressful morning. And I could TOTALLY see myself doing that with one of my kids too.
I love this. Last week I locked Jake and his friend Ty in my van...luckily Jake was temporarily in a booster and got himself unbuckled :) I thought of you the whole time :)
This is one of the best stories I have heard in a long time. Thank you for sharing.
Ok, I just got the best visual of Jacks Halloween costume this year!!! THE SUPER HERO SNAIL!!!
You of all people could make the coolest costume from that!!
Christi
oh my... that was fun to read! :)
brittany
oh man this is so funny!!!!
Thanks, Heth. That was a well-told story. I am cracking up!
I love your stories. They validate my whole parenting experience. Honestly. When we have one of those insane parent or kid things (like my 4 YO drawing me a picture on the side of our brand new car with a screw he found lying around), I think of your family and am reminded that my own family is not uniquely...anything.
And - program Pop A Lock into your cell phone and/or commit the number to memory. They will come and unlock your car for free if there are kids inside.
http://www.popalock.com/emergency_door_unlocking.php
That is absolutely hysterical - just read about it over on Trashy's blog and had to come and say hello and tell you what a superstar Jack is! Lucy x
I would have REALLY liked to have seen that! How funny!
one word. two syllables. hysterial.
What a little hero! Too bad you weren't able to take pictures!
LOL....I have had things happen (NOT LIKE THIS!) that I wonder if anyone else has had happen - makes me feel a little more normal...this post is hilarious, you are way too funny!!! God bless!
This is hilarious!! And very clever of you!!
THIS IS HILARIOUS!!! What a funny story to recall at his wedding! ha, ha....thanks for sharing. My husband and I are in stitches!
This post made me laugh SO HARD. Your family is so much fun! I love your stories. But this one...THIS one really made me laugh hard. It's so awesome that you're documenting all of these hilarious moments!
What a awesome telling of a unique story momma story. Give Jack a high five for me. Motherhood is such a crazy adventure. Thanks for sharing it!!!
I found your blog through Rocks In My Dryer. I normal do not comment on someone's blog if I don't know them but man this was too funny. I could see the whole thing in my head. I had to hold my laughter in because my three was asleep. Once again, too funny!!!
That is hilarious, I have three at the crucial booster/5 point dilema stage and I can just imagine.....
OMG That is the funniest thing I've read all week!!
Best thing I've read all week!
That boy deserves all of the Halloween candy that is coming!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (minus the reese's pumpkins...because you did some pretty creative coaching!)
I am really giggling at this...thanks for the smle i needed it!
My 16 year old could ecape any seat..belt...harness you could wish for...she is severely disabled and now travels in her wheelchiar....on a long journey she can even escape from that! I have a perfect vision of your turtle!
hugs
That is just to funny. You made my stomach hurt from laughing so hard.
oh.my.goodness! bless your heart ROFL, sorry I have to laugh, because for one, it is now over, and for two, I think we have all done this. LOL I can so picture your story in my head, seeing him crawl over each seat with that carseat on, while your outside cheering him on LOLOL. Once I locked my two year old in our honda passport,he was asleep, i opened the door, was going to go open his door, my door slammed shut, bam, doors locked. DUMB. I panicked then i realized, oh the back hatch.. luckily it didnt lock on its own, but im sure everyone around got a good laugh at me crawling through that back window LOL.. also, stick with the 5 point harness, even if he gets too big for it, still use the seat, just take the harness out. We were in a wreck once when my oldest was about 4, he was in a booster, this is before the laws on height, weight etc.. the state trooper "advised" me to take him out of that booster, put him back in a seat, even if its with the seatbelt, a high back booster.. reason being is the regular old boosters have caused many issues with children during a crash, like spleen issues.. rupturing spleens, bruised etc. because the seat during impact slides out from under the child, and the seat belt jerks them back so hard. so, needless to say with my youngest, we always use the high back boosters..which most parents probably do now..just a warning for some that may not know.
I am just happy to know that I am not the only person who has ever locked her kids in the van in a public place and had to coach a kid in climbing out of his seat and unlocking a door. :)
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